Everyone will read this and exempt themselves. Justify. That’s the way selfish people are, even in small towns. But since some of it applies to over 95+% of you, maybe you should take these things under consideration. Try that in a small town.

Try reading the speed limit signs while driving into a small town – and obeying them. I know it is shocking and irritating to see people slowing down on the highway when you’ve been driving 75 mph for a half hour, but perhaps they are slowing down because they ARE ENTERING A SMALL TOWN. The signs handily placed on the roadside will tell you when the limit drops to 70, then 60, then 55, then 45, then 35. And here’s the thing, the reason the speed limit drops is because fast vehicles driven by oblivious drivers who are shocked by the appearance of towns along the way are dangerous to small children on bikes, to cats crossing the road, and to people pulling out from their own driveways. You wanna feel good about small towns? Stop being a menace on the highways that lead into those towns. Try that in a small town.

Try this in a small town. Park considerately. Between the lines. In the actual parking space. I know you have a big truck and you’re super important in your small town, but that doesn’t mean you get two parking spaces or that you can pull up past the line behind a car with a back liftgate so close that they can’t open it to put a stroller or their mom’s wheelchair in the back. Don’t pull across three spots in front of the convenience store or the ice kiosk because you’re important and you’re in a hurry. If you really want to experience historical and awesome small-town life, stop being a selfish, narcissistic, sociopath. Try that in a small town.

Like small-town life so much you can’t help applauding a song about how badass small towns are? Try this in a small town… Pick up trash. Don’t just throw it near a trashcan or into the back of your truck because you know it’s going to blow out (but you’re not actually littering, right?) If you want to pump your fist about small towns, take a few minutes when you walk out of a store, or your work, or the gym and pick up a piece of trash and put it in the receptacle or take it home or put it in a dumpster. Try that in a small town.

Going back to the first thing… how about you don’t speed through downtown or rig your car or truck so they are deafeningly loud, or peel out from greenlights or stop signs. Stop being a danger or a hazard to others. Obey the rules of the road that are in place to protect and love your neighbor. Drive respectfully and pretend that your childish pleasures aren’t more important than the safety and health of others. Try that in a small town.

How about this, treat workers and servers respectfully. Thank people who serve you and tip them well. Shop locally and do your best to help businesses whose owners live in your small town to be successful and to employ your neighbors. Stop buying everything on Amazon and eating at national chains while your small-town neighbors are struggling to make it. Try that in a small town.

Saying “We don’t put up with riots” just might be a pretty low bar to set for small-town life. How about you try “Love Thy Neighbor”?

Try that in a Small Town.

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Michael Bunker is a local columnist for BrownwoodNews.com whose columns appear periodically on the website. Email comments to  [email protected].